How to Live a Life of Purpose and Authenticity
Lessons from a journey from poverty to purpose and power.
Lan Phan is a first generation American from Vietnamese refugees and grew up in poverty in Englewood, California. Her childhood was not easy. She lost a friend to gang violence at the age of 13, had to support herself at 17 and lost her father at 19. Her dad was an executive in Vietnam, but after the war, he was left with nothing and became a shadow of a man. He never worked in the US. Her mom? She did what she could, as a hairdresser who never made more than $15,000 a year, supporting a family of 5.
But Lan turned it all around. She became a:
Psychology undergraduate from Stanford University
Masters graduate from Harvard
Real estate investor
Music mogul
Marketing maven
Executive coach
Community founder
Published author
Self-help guru
She is nothing short of a polymath!
How?
After spending sometime with Lan, it struck me that her tough circumstance during childhood had a large part to play in her resilience and drive - it pushed her to attain big goals and made her the person she is today.
She used her bad position to propel herself to a better one.
“It’s our hardship that shapes us. It’s not something that we should be afraid of".”
Lan Phan
One my favorite pieces of research on Lan was this article by CNN Money in 2004: Tycoon in the making Lan Phan. She was featured as a young investor, buying properties and building a “f*ck you fund” that would be the foundation of her bold pursuits later in life.
Lan’s purpose today as a founder of Community of Seven is to democratize purpose led leadership so leaders of all backgrounds and levels can better impact the world.
Insights on Lan’s journey to a purposeful life:
1/ Having someone believe in you is game-changing
Lan moved to the US from Vietnam when she was 8 months old. So she was practically born in the US, but she was in ESL (English as a second language) class until 5th grade. She was afraid to speak up and really shy. Until one of her teachers, Miss Wilson in elementary school encouraged her to get on the debate team.
She ended up winning the debate championship and her life changed.
2/ Use the your painful circumstance as fuel
When she was in high-school, she did every extracurricular activity imaginable. This served two goals: 1) Build a stellar college application 2) Avoid her father. Her dad struggled after escaping Vietnam and those struggles erupted as mood swings, which Lan was desperate to avoid. She knew the only way out was through education and she made it her mission as a teenager to pull herself and her family out of poverty. She used her painful existence as fuel to do whatever it takes to escape.
And she did, eventually buying her mom’s house along with the other units in the triplex. She had a clear why - attaining safety and security for her and her family, and that drove her focus.
3/ Don’t trust the environment, trust in yourself
One of the tougher moments in her life was being laid off as a Fortune Magazine executive. From having a team and a multi-million dollar budget to nothing was a tremendous blow. This was the same time her husband also lost his job in the pandemic.
With two mortgages to pay and no meaningful income, Lan felt all the fear, the shame, the lows, but then trusted in her own abilities to move forward and rebound. That’s how she started her executive coaching practice and community - Community of Seven. (She just had seven people, including herself and her daughter when she started)
“I would be crying in my pajamas that I hadn’t washed for a week and she (daughter in kindergarten) was like ‘mommy I love you even without a job’ and she even did this breathing exercise with me…breathe in, breathe out, as I was crying uncontrollably.”
Lan Phan
4/ Every side-quest or pivot is meaningful
I was talking to a friend this past week and the idea of side-quests came up. In our game of life, we have so many opportunities to embark on these side-quests and often it turns out that the sum of all of them allows you to accomplish the main one.
Lan talks about her real estate investment period as a powerful chapter that gave her the ability to try roles and work in toxic environments knowing fully that she could leave at anytime. Her music venture, her marketing career, all showed her that she could figure just about anything out if she tried. These experiences laid the foundation for resilience.
“None of my career pivots was a waste of time… I knew in the back of my head that I could quit at any moment because I was a real estate investor.”
Lan Phan
5/ Building a personal brand changed Lan’s life
It wasn’t about fame or getting “likes”, it was about helping other people and as she got replies from people saying her content changed their life, she kept going.
If you want to help as many people as you can, you NEED to build brand. Lan and I both started after we were laid off, but you don’t have to (read this letter for more.)
Watch a short 90 second video on Instagram where Lan talks about the two types of people in the world (P.S. Follow me on Instagram, it’s the only place where I will post short clips from all my interviews)
My biggest takeaway from Lan is this:
Everyone must walk their own path and as they approach each quarter of their life, be willing to reflect, pivot and shift. This is how to live a purposeful and authentic life.
Howie Chan
Creator of Influence Anyone
Don’t miss:
The Influence Anyone Podcast
Lan shares her Four Quarters Life Strategy to help you figure out what you should be focusing on.
🎧 Listen to it on Apple, Spotify, the web or wherever you get your podcasts.